IIM-K: Kill Two

After a two day gap and feeling kozy kozy, I was ready for the Kozhikode Kill.

My interview was on 18^th Feb at Hotel Vikram, New Delhi. It was scheduled at 1330 hours, and this time breaking all previous records I reached the venue well … I reached the venue three hours in advance.

 

To my disgust, there was no proper seating arrangement provided for the students and the ones accompanying them. Most of the people were either standing or were glued firmly to their seats so that others don’t snatch them. Unlike Shillong, there were no refreshments, no tea, no water. It was all so agonizing!

Killing three hours this time sounded an uphill task. Chit-chatting seemed impossible because the only students present were of the morning batch and were busy with their interviews. Consequently I thought a wise option would be to read newspapers. I read 4 newspapers, each thrice. Subsequently, a little talk with an Aunty sitting close by followed which did put to death those idle hours.

As soon as the clock struck 1300 hours I went inside a big hall where document verification was being done. The WAT (Written Ability Test) started at 1345 hours. We were handed a 5 page sheet to write an essay.

WAT topic: "There are not seven wonders in the eyes of a child. There are seven million."

We were allotted 45 minutes to write. An easy topic to write on, as I’ve always loved these kind of abstract topics. Wrote decent enough in roughly three pages. After exact 45 minutes we were divided into 4 panels and were told our numbers. I came in panel 2 and my number was bloody 09!

The panel 2 was interviewing the candidates on second floor. I went there at 1630 hours. At that time, number 06 was being interviewed. Everything was audible from the outside of the room. The whole conversation could be overheard from the outside. I came to the conclusion that the panel was asking general questions. Sitting beside me outside was an IIT Delhi girl who told me that she was placed in BCG to which I wondered who prefers K over BCG? Even she corroborated the fact by hinting just for the sake of it! She was soon called inside.  Her interview went on for like 20-25 minutes. The next to go was a person aged 29 with 5 year work-ex. After another 20 minutes, I was called inside.

I was called in at 05:05 pm by one of the panelist, Dr.Kousik Guhathakurta  (I’d call him P1). The other panelist seating inside was Dr. Anandakutan B. Unnithan  (I’d call him P2). 

So this is a brief account of whatever happened. Read on!

As soon as I entered the room I greeted both of them.

P2:  Please be seated and give me your verified documents.

Me: Thank you, Sir. [Hands over all the documents]

P2:  [While checking my grades and scorecards] So, are you doing good in IIT Roorkee?

Me: Yes sir. [smiles]

P2:  Tell me what you are pursuing?

Me:  Sir, I am a final year student of Chemical engineering.

P2:  Where do you come from?

Me:  Told

P2:  Tell me about Dehradun.

Me:  Told

P2:  Any news about it. [Suddenly remembering] Oh, yes. Elections! How was it?

Me:  Told

P2:  Who do you think would win?

Me:  Sir, there is a stiff competition between BJP and Congress. Any party can thrash the other. God knows who would do it this time.

P2:  Whom do you support? What’s your analysis?

Me:  Gyaan

P2:  What are the problems faced by the people of Uttarakhand?

Me: Arbit bakar

P2:  Like?

Me:  Gyaan with examples here and there

P2:  How does Uttarakhand government generate revenue?

Me:  Told 

P2:  Is Uttarakhand an earthquake prone area?
Me: Yes, it is. However, I don't know which zone it lies in.

Now P1 chips in.

P1:  Are you placed?

Me:  Yes, sir!

P1:  Where?

Me:  Sir, Reliance Industries Limited.

P2:  Wow! Good. That is a wonderful company for Chemical engineers.

Me:  [With a smug gleam of felicitation] Yes Sir! It is. [I don’t know why, and there was no need for it. But I exaggerated it.] Actually, I did an internship there, and was offered a Pre Placement Offer.

Now, the real disaster snowballed. Read on ..

P1: [Unmoved by the second half of my answer] Tell me what is dead heat?

Me:  [Shocked] I don’t think Sir I’ve ever heard of this term.

P1: Okay, so tell me about Second law of thermodynamics?

Me:  [Stunned again. Knew it, but wasn’t able to remember] It is actually something related to entropy. [Also, out of nowhere linked it with H=U +pV  Started explaining him this expression which was not required at all!]
 
P1:  Leave this. What would happen to entropy?

Me:  I don’t know, Sir. [But, told him the definition of entropy]

P1:  What do we mean when we say entropy is increasing?

Me:  It means disorder is increasing.

P1: What if it keeps on increasing and increasing and increasing? Would it be good or bad?

Me:  Logically speaking, if chaos and disorder is increasing around us, it is bad- really bad for the society and mankind.

P1: Ah! Come on, I am not asking about ‘Social Entropy’. I am asking about thermodynamic entropy.

Me:  Umm .. No clue, Sir.

P1: [Rephrasing his question. Now slowly.] What would happen if the entropy of the world and universe keeps on increasing?

Me:  I don’t think I can relate entropy to real life, Sir. [Became totally dumb, and felt like one]

P1:  What do you like about Chemical Engineering? I mean, what is your favorite subject?

Me:  In Chemical engineering, I love heat transfer as a subject. [Knew more horrific questions would be shot now]

P1: [Laughs]Yes, heat transfer. [Looks at P1] I knew it. I was coming to it.

P1:  Can heat be transferred via induction?

Me: [Crap! Holy Crap! Bowled again.] Heat is transferred from a hot object to cold object, Sir. However, I don’t know what induction means. I know about EMI (Electromagnetic Induction), but I’ve never heard of this term in heat transfer. Should I tell about EMI? [Didn’t even know this one properly]

P1:  Hmm?

Me:  Managed to put forth something on EMI. Wasn’t satisfactory at all!

I’d like to thank P2 who comes in with the rescue this time.

P2:  What do you like to do apart from studies?

Me:  Sir, I’ve been actively involved with … [interrupted]

P2:  No, I mean your hobby?

Me:  I like writing blog.

P1: [With a grin] Do you write on pagalguy.com?

Me: [Bewildered] No Sir. I maintain a personal blog of mine.

P2:  What do you write about?

Me:  I share my personal experiences.

P2:  Is your blog popular?

Me: No Sir. Not a popular one.

P2:  How many hits do you get on it?

Me:  Not much, Sir. I don’t like sharing my blog url and posts with people. I write it so that after 10-15 years, when I read it I can recall all these wonderful experiences. I don’t like to keep track of number of counts. However, the last blog post I wrote  about my IIM-S Interview experience saw many hits – roughly 200-300 hits in a single day.

P2: But, you told you don’t like sharing your posts.

Me:  This post I had shared on a forum on pagalguy.com so that my experiences could be helpful to the forthcoming batches.

P2:  What would you write about today’s experience?

Me:  I’d like to write whatever happened or is happening with me today.

P2:  What would you write about me? How would you address me as?

Me:  Sir, firstly I’ll try to search out your names from IIM-K website. The problem with IIM-S interview was that I couldn’t find out their names from the website, as the faculty profile pages didn’t have their photographs .So, I addressed them as … [interrupts]

P2:  How many Interviewers were there?

Me:  Three in my panel.

P2:  Was one of them very old? Like me? [smiles]

Me:  Yes. One of them was old. Not like you, Sir. You are young. He must’ve been 60+.

P2:  What about others?

Me:  Told about them and their ages

P2: Okay, so we hope you write about today also.

Me:  Sure Sir!

P2: Okay, so that’s it from our side. Do you have anything to ask?

Me: Not anything in particular Sir, but one thing. How is Kozhikode as a place like?

P2:  It is a wonderful place. It is on a hill top. When you’ll join it, you won’t miss your state Uttarakhand. The scenic beauty and everything is like Uttarakhand.

Me: Climate might be pleasant, I guess. Like, Uttarakhand sees a lot of fluctuations in the climate. We have very cold winters and very warm summers.

P2:  Yes. That you won’t have here. The climate remains pleasant throughout. Temperature remains almost constant throughout.

Me:  Okay, Sir. [smiles]

I stood up from my chair. Preparing to go out.

P2: [Scans me from top to bottom] Oh, but why don’t you have a boutonnière? Everything else is so gentleman-ish with you. Raymond [?] suit. Formal attire. Everything looks good, but that 5 rupee pen should be replaced with a boutonnière. This 5 rupee pen looks horrible.

Me:  Yes Sir. I would. However, earlier I had a costlier pen here. [Grins] But, that broke yesterday, so I kept it.

P2:  Yes. Something good should be put here. Not this cheap pen. Fine?

Me:  Okay, Sir. I’ll definitely do that. [smiles]

P1:  Do you have any Interview now?

Me:  Yes Sir. I have my Bangalore Interview on 14^th March now. [smiles]

P1 & P2:  All the best for that.

Me:  Thank you, Sir. [smiles]

Thus, I came out. 

Two down. Big Bang, next!

IIM-S: Strike One

So the fray all started with the first Interview for the Seventh IIM of its kind: Shillong. 

My interview was on 15^th Feb at Hotel Mantras, New Delhi.  My interview was scheduled at 1400 hours, and I reached the venue 2 hours well in advance.

When I reached the venue, I was guided towards the Basement of the Hotel near the Swimming Pool. With 2 hours to kill, I thought a wise option would to be drink as much coffee/tea (provided), eat as much biscuits and engage as much as I could in some random chit-chatting with fellows around. Simultaneously, I cross-checked my Interview form and files once again. Very soon, I came across a friend from IIT Roorkee. When two fellows from the same institute meet, all it leads to is pure bakar. Nothing more. Nothing less.

I also came across a girl from Reliance Industries Limited, the company I got placed in and got some insights into the work culture of the company. I was told soothing things about Reliance from her, like Reliance is a cool place to work at with no work load.  In times of tension, little things like these can provide you much-needed solace.

Hardly had the clock stuck 1345 hours when a young man aged 30-35 came and took our attendance. After a couple of minutes more, they finally called 8 people for Case Study-GD inside a room on the second floor.

As soon as we entered the room, there were 8 chairs each with a number plate and we were told to sit in a specific seat. I was allotted seat number 6. Panel consisted of three members with an old person (aged more than 60) and two not so young (aged 45-50). One of the panelist listed certain guidelines and told that we have a case study in front of us and we have 10 mins to analyze and write about it and then 15 mins to discuss.

Case Study Topic: The case dealt with the Air India facing a financial crunch because of loads of its outstanding bills from the Government of India. Some mammoth hypothetical data was given and as a Minister of Civil Aviation, we were asked an opinion on whether private jet carriers should be compared with Air India in terms of profitability and facilities. Is this comparison really justified or not?

I got ample of time to put forth my viewpoints. After 10 minutes, one of the panelist told time is up and we need to start our discussion. To my surprise, for the first 1^1/2 minute no one spoke. There was pin-drop silence around. I could have initiated the discussion, but why be a bond? Thanks to a guy on my right, who started the GD putting forth his gyaan on the case.  Then a guy on the extreme right carried forth. I was the third one to put forward my point. I think I made decent attempts, and got sufficient time to speak. There wasn’t a fish market in our GD.  Finally we ended the discussion when the panelists asked us to cut the crap out!  We were subsequently told that we would be interviewed according to the numbers allotted. That meant, I would be the 6^th person to be interviewed.

GD was over by 2:30PM and my interview was expected to start after 2 hours. Meanwhile, I was busy wandering like an idiot and selling "All The best" biscuits outside the interview room.  

I was called in at 4:30 pm by one of the panelist (He was wearing specs, so I’d call him S). There were other two interviewers seated inside. An old man (I’d call him D) and another not-so young man (I’d call him Y). 

So this is a brief account of whatever happened. Read on!

S:  Abhishek Bangr-ea-niya. Please come in.

Me: [For God’s sake it is Bangrania] Thank you, Sir. And, a very good afternoon to you Sir.

S:  Please be seated and hand me over your file.

While he started flipping over my certis/marksheets/scorecards, etc, etc. Mr. D chipped in.

D: So you are from which college? And, which year?

Me:  [Isn’t all this already written there? I mean everywhere.] Sir, IIT Roorkee. I’m a final year student of Chemical Engineering.

D:  Tell me about your college.

Me:  Told. Even told it has got a wonderful history, and it is a wonderful place to be in. 

D: [Puzzled at my response] So you think IIT Roorkee is better than all other IITs?

Me: Told each IIT is unique, and some gyaan on how and why.

D: Shouldn’t we convert all colleges in India into IITs?

Me:  Cannot. And, should not. Some bakar on why.

D: Why are we not considering making Benaras Hindu University into an IIT?

Me: Got confused with the name. Was told he meant IT-BHU. Knowing it, told some arbit bakar.

Then Mr. Y chipped in with something random all of a sudden.

Y: What is the climing of your state like?

Me: [Shocked] Climing? I don’t know Sir what that means.

Y: You don’t know the climate of your state?

Me: Climate, Sir. Yes. Okay. Pleasant it is. I love it, Sir. I love the North India, especially Uttarakhand and Himachal Pradesh.

Y: How would you rate Uttarakhand as a State? Development-wise?

Me: Gyaan

Y: Any recent news about your state? How is the Government like?

Me: Told. Arbit bakar.

Y: Where do you live?

Me: Dehradun, Sir.

Y: Does this Dehradun lie in Uttarakhand? Or UP?

Me: [What?] It is the capital of Uttarakhand, Sir. It was a part of UP till 2001.

Y: Has Dehradun seen massive improvement after the formation of a new state?

Me: Gyaan

Y: Where is Uttarakhand lagging on national level and why?

Me: Told.

Y: What are the Sources of income for your State?

Me: Told.

Y: You told Tehri dam. Tell me the current scenario of this dam.

Me: Told.

Y: How would you help Uttarakhand youth in getting employment opportunities?

Me: Gyaan.

Y: I read somewhere that Dehradun is becoming very populated and even polluted these days. Why?

Me: Sir, many people are migrating from other cities in view of better opportunities. As a result, there is a large human influx and consequently these problems. 

I was happy with the fact that no technical questions were being asked when suddenly Mr. S chipped in, who earlier had been continuously staring at me.

S: Okay, Abhishek. You had a subject on Process Dynamics and Control in your 6^th Semester. Could you throw some light on this subject?

Me: Told something. Couldn’t define it properly. Was stuck. He also didn’t seem satisfied with my answer.

S: No, I ain’t getting it. Tell me again and explain it to me by drawing whatever you are saying.

Me: Told some weird definition. Drew a CSTR with a control valve. Told him the kinds of Control Valves and how it functions. Somehow managed to draw the Control Valve diagram correctly after cutting it once and redrawing it.

S: Okay, then there is another subject you studied. This is Process Equipment Design. Tell me how and what all considerations are kept in mind while designing any equipment?

Me: Chem fundaes told.

S: Design any equipment of your choice explaining everything in detail.

Me: Thought for a second. Wasn't remembering anything, unless something stuck  me. I thought of drawing the diagram of Coke drum (the one on which I did my Intern at RIL). Coke drum is my forte. Hehe

S: Tell me the metallurgy details of this Coke Drum.

Me: Sir, Metallurgy details as in?

S: What kind of material is used in it and why?

Me: Told different layers with the innermost being Stainless Steel.

S: If I use Mild Steel, what would happen?

Me: Metallurgy? I am not a Metallurgical engg, Sir! Still, some gyaan

S: You are wrong!

Me: [I thought I was correct] Okay, I am sorry Sir.

S: What is the importance of Organization & Management in a Chemical Engineer’s life?

Me: Gyaan

Hardly had I completed my answer when Mr. D jumped in with a completely offbeat question.

D: Do you like taking or giving bribes?

Me: No, Sir. As a man of principles, I’d never do such a thing.

D: As a manager of a hypothetical company, if you don’t become a part of it, your company would incur a huge loss and your employees would go broke. According to me, you should take it, else you’ll come on roads financially ruined.

Me: Thought for a second, and replied with a stern NO. Accompanied by some gyaan.

D: Tell you what, this way you’ll ruin your company, your employees and yourself. Think!?

Me: Didn’t understand whether he was asking me a question or was telling me the answer. I just smiled and nodded stupidly.

S: Abhishek, you have a PPO from Reliance Industries Limited, which is an awesome company. Why do you want to waste two precious years of your life in Shillong doing MBA? Go and join that company. You’ll learn a lot.

Me: [Waste?]Sir, I want to know the business side …… [interrupted]

S: Abhishek, don’t give me clichéd answers.

Me: Rephrased and told. He seemed satisfied.

D: Tell me what will we teach you at Shillong?

Me: Umm… I think Finance, Accounts, and all that  ...

D: [Chuckles] What do you mean by “all that”? Tell me did you check it or not?

Me: Sorry Sir, I didn’t.

D: Are all IIMs same?

Me: I think, Sir.

D: Why would you like to join us?

Me: Shillong Gyaan

All this while, Mr. Y kept on writing something hiding his notebook. I wonder what?

S: Okay, Abhishek. That’s it. You may leave now. And, yes take a toffee.

D: All the best!

Me: Thank you, Sir!

Y: Which IIM interview do you have next?

Me: K, Sir.

Y: Okay, all the best!

Me: Thanks a lot, Sir.

I wanted to pick one toffee, but caught hold of three and ended up with two.

So, that was it. Good 25-30 minute Interview.

One Down! K, next.

Time tossed around

As I begin to write this blog post after half a dozen months one thing narks me: How much life has changed since my last blog post? Much has happened, much not happened; much has changed, much not changed. I still cannot apprehend the fact of this long hiatus. However, now owing to the random thoughts consorting in my head in a haphazard way for the last six months, I wish to post them for the sake of my head.

Adieu, Junior Year: 

Broadly speaking, 3-2 is the most crucial semester in one’s entire college life, provided he is not a Dulla (Dual degree student). Managing a salubrious 8.6 in 3-1 had generated immense confidence within and motivated me to hit a 9 or even 10! Numbers below 9 or 10 seemed nothing now. However, these are the times when one should cut down his wings, and come down to earth. These are also the times when one should retrieve his strengths/weaknesses. If not, core subjects like Process Equipment Design and Industrial Instrumentation will shower you with B’s and C+’s. And, A+’s in Communication Skills would hardly offset the damage done by these High Credit Courses. Result: You end up, where you already are with hardly any rise or fall.

So ended 3-2!

Gujarat:

When you don’t expect things to happen, they happen. And, they happen to an extent that provides you with a paid Internship at world’s biggest refinery complex, Reliance Industries Limited at Jamnagar in Gujarat. Hate core chemical stuff, and Chemical will always love you! It’s like run from something and it will always follow you.

Everything remotely related to academics seem farce when you land in a state where you never had been before. The excitement and enjoyment to explore it titillates you to an extent that you forget everything. This feeling gets magnified when you start meeting new people. Then commence trips, strolls, get-togethers, fun, parties, and what-not!

All magnified feeling start to die out and diminish when you actualize that your birthday is imminent, and the group you’ve made will beat your bums down to hell. So was it on June 3! Beating was followed by a surprise party which was hardly expected from me. So, was fixed a day in my memory which would always be cherished.

As the end came near, so came the work pressure. As believed, IITians don’t give productive results until their arse is on fire. This gospel was proved right yet again. The immense pressure was handled successfully. Result: Decent presentation. Ripe report. Happy mentor. 

So ended Gujarat!


Aloha, Senior year:

And, all of a sudden you find yourself in Senior year. Everything around seems about to fly by and disappear. You realize all these things (hang-outs, random blabs, etc etc) would vanish and die out. You would go into a completely new world with memories alone. Everything else would be left behind. Result: Senti posts at hand in the days to come! 

So begins the final year!

IIT: High Hopes & Drooling Desires: Where are We?

It has been 5 odd semesters since I embarked upon a new life in this endearing insti. I had come from a classy awing Doon with High Hopes and Drooling Desires, as a naïf and squeamish boy of Seventeen. My anticipations from this place were quite idealistic, high-minded and lofty. I had entered into this place because I was one of those many few who were turned on by the catholicity of Newton’s Laws, infinitesimal calculus, lengthy organic reactions during the High school days. The idea of entering into the premier institute of the country and being taught by the holy saints (read: Profs) where learner meant ‘learner for learning’s sake’, were few aspects which gloated me. I had expected people of a similar nature to be my new classmates, neighbors, allies and acquaintances. All this meant a ‘dream come true’ to me. I was on cloud nine!

On the contrary, in all the above respects, the bygone years have been a bitter pill to swallow. This place has dejected me in a lot of ways. From the bureaucratic inactivity to the teaching methodology to the courses offered to the academic curriculum to the relative grading system to the Professors to the Placement scenario to the Companies recruiting to the constant unhygienic mess food and to what-not, everything is in deplorable condition, coming apart and going to pieces.

The best brains in the country are turning into rats and dirty dogs. People have been measured by their grades and CGPAs. A guy with lower CGPA becomes a matter of trifle importance, and the one with a higher is revered by one and all, even if the latter is a big time bozo. The system in this place is not too helpful either. We, as a nation, have always catered to the best among us. If you are a topper, you are a star, if you are not, you are a nobody. This attitude acts as a body-blow to the ego of the "average" student here, who "falls" from being the top dog in school to a nonentity in college. In this rat-race, the average Joe loses his identity and his self-pride, being reduced to being in the peloton, to be in the shadow of the high-flier.

Talking about the holy saints, what else would you call people who are phony, bogus and hypocrites? Probably, ‘Equus asinus’! No one focus or pay attention on what a student likes and what not, what is important and what not, what is recent and of prime importance and what not, how to make lectures interesting and how not. I had expected my degree to be a pursuit of more knowledge from these saints to learn for learning’s sake, and not to learn for marks, grades, CGPAs, DRs (Departmental Ranks), IRs (Institutional Ranks) and all such bummer. 

Actually, the flaw lies with the system itself. I personally feel that once the JEE results are out, the IIT Administration need to conduct an Aptitude test (to bestow an appropriate branch to a particular individual) based on which the classification need to be done and not on the basis of mere JEE ranks. Moreover, as far as the pedagogy goes, I sincerely hold the notion that these big time holy saints need to seriously brush up their own concepts before taking up any class/lecture and simultaneously also refer to the videos of their counterparts far away in MITs, Stanford, et al. Moreover, they should focalize on something recent, practical and productive (not outdated theories and laws).

Else (as already seen), it would hardly take any time for this large brain-chunk to stop caring for anything remotely academic and resorting to other career options or draining their brains with a meaningless Er.(Engineer) before their names as a refuge to some distant land far far away ...  (Talk about brain drain then?)

The night it was ..

The auspicious day, 1/1/11 was being greeted both warmly and coldly, until a loud scream of 'Do ya thang song' by T.I (which happens to be my current ringing tone) almost blew out of the water … and woke me up!

Yes, as expected 2010 was bid adieu at 23:59 hours in sopor. So was the advent of 2011 greeted at 00:00 hours beneath a warm quilt with Coldplay songs in background (which I realized once I woke up. The songs kept on playing with the repeat mode on).

Almost an hour past midnight when the T.I song (hinting a phone call) made me alive, I idly crawled my hand out of the immense warmheartedness of the quilt to reach for the phone. Laziness proved fatal, and as soon  as I picked it up, it got disconnected within fraction of a second. My eyes were wide open when the phone flashed 22 missed calls, and 24 unread messages. I was realizing what being a jackass is, until I planned to offset it. I decided to call back people and message everyone whom I missed wishing new year.

Hardly had I made up for my mistake when I realized who actually a jackass is. As I decided to call back, the phone averred – “You are currently out of balance. You have zero rupees, forty eight paisa left in your account. Dial one for balance account, two for refill, three for speaking to an ….”, to which I abused, disconnected and bedeviled my phone. I waited in anticipation for some more calls, but in vain. Who wishes people after 01:00 am, anyway? Still, I managed to find a couple of them online on facebook. Still lot more expected me! 

P.S: I finally did offset my blunder the next day (i.e today), when I actually called Home and everywhere else, to which I got alike greetings – “Hey, where were you last night?” Well, partying - coldly and warmly! Does that actually mean anything, anyway? 

P.P.S: For those (if anyone reading) who expected much more than what eventually (read: lame) the post turned out to be, I apologize for it. The title aptly matches with the post, and the bummer I was in  the previous night. I know: "Crap, Holy crap" is what this turned out to be. Life is not fair, always. 'Happy New Year!'  

P.P.P.S: To those who want to offset the effects of this dull crappy post, here's an interesting fact :157+163+167+173+179+181+191+193+197+ 199 +211=2011. 2011 is the first prime number which can b written as a sum of eleven consecutive prime numbers.

Culmination of 3-1

The semester kicked off on a high note with loads of vows, pledges and resolutions, but on the contrary ended on a low with loads of prayers, expectations, grades, marks, but all in complete vain. As they put it, as you sow so shall you reap!

In an IIT, after getting decent marks in TS-1 and screwing badly TS-2, your arse is all set on fire for the end terms. Do it now, do it straight off, else the insti has no regrets in giving you panji's (5 on a scale of 10). So was this arse of mine. Eventually, the gaps in between the exams proved to be crucial and everything went alright.

The subjects I didn’t get a feel and flavor of resulted in very dismal performances, though.  Grade B or may be even lower is already expected in one of ChemD’s core subject, CH-305: Reaction Engineering. Moreover, my face has a smug gleam of felicitation after acing the subjects I loved the most. IHS03: Group Dynamics was one of them.

However, well, there’s no time and scope for the feel thing when you are in an IIT. Do whatever the system demands, else the system comes back at you and leave you in shatters. So, it is better if you go along with the flow without giving a thought about what-you-like and what-you-don’t-like. Perhaps, the only way to be a successful fucked-up Engineer. Trust me!

Losing grip

The past few months have seen within me a swashbuckler. I have turned into a reckless, careless, lunatic mortal. Things go over my head, issues irk me, people rankle me, weird things fascinate me, issues of no-importance trance me. I have heard highly educated people preaching a gospel that one should do what their heart tells them to do. On a different note, what if your heart does not wish to do anything? What if your mind needs only repose? What if you propose to leave all the terrene affairs? Not so simple, though. 

Few days back I told my younger sis about a weird thought of mine – a thought to leave everything and go to the Himalayas to live a life of peace and serenity. The only reply she gave me with a wary look was – “I am going to tell Mom about this.”

Then, all of a sudden I realize that a couple of years more and everything would be over. All these draggy and ho-hum engineering principles and theories would find an end leaving me in complete freedom. However, this end would mark the beginning of a yet new period – a period in which I would eventually find myself working in some crippled Chemical company surrounded by more crippled employees and lame officials. Would this be called an end or a beginning, then? I personally would call this a deadlock.

Management is the probably the only thing left which still happens to charm and captivate me, but didn’t Engineering have the same appeal in the early days when I was preparing to make it into a prestigious college? I am in no mood to answer here the hackneyed question: ”Why I eventually lost interest in Engineering?” Probably this is why I came out of a TATA Steel written test in a flash as soon as I encountered all gimpy Engineering-related questions yet again, to which I had no better option left. I even bypassed few other companies I came across. A huge transition from what I was like an year ago, when I was constantly worried about all this. Well truly said, ‘All that glitters is not Gold’.

No one can predict the future, but one can surely make it. All in all, I have started trusting my conscience. Whatever I feel like doing, I have been blindly doing it. On the contrary, whatever narks me now finds a place in the bin, no matter its worth or consequences. Moreover if the predicament within my mind continues to amplify, I might even end up being a recluse, or not?